Urge Surfing for Maps

Some maps talk about having the urge to offend. Others are troubled by their thoughts, although they know that they won't offend. A technique called "urge surfing" might help prevent offending and help maps to accept their thoughts.

"Urge surfing" is a mindfulness practice that promotes "surfing" urges -- staying aware of the ebbs and flows of your urges -- instead of suppressing them. When you have urges or troubling thoughts, "surfing" the waves of them may help, rather than trying to suppress them. Suppressing urges often makes them worse. Instead, urge surfing encourages people to stay present with their urges non-judgmentally.

How do I know this will help? My therapist at first encouraged me to try to suppress my map-related sexual thoughts, which just ended up making them more prevalent. Instead, what has helped me is my therapist's assurance that there is nothing wrong with my thoughts and that I should accept them. Urge surfing is a way of accepting these thoughts, while also helping to prevent offending.

Note that I'm not saying that having urges to offend counts as an addictive behavior. It doesn't. But people have all kinds of urges that can be damaging; the urge to use alcohol or drugs isn't the only urge that techniques like urge surfing can help with.

If you feel that you're at risk of offending, or you're troubled by sexual thoughts about children or teens, listen to the recording halfway down this page (courtesy of the University of Washington's Addictive Behaviors Research Center).

Remember to ride the waves and enjoy the sun and the surf, regardless of what kind of thoughts you have.

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